ArcaMax

Admit it. You and I sigh for it. At times, we yearn for it. We dream of finding it embodied in one special person, discovering the real thing we crave. Everyone's always looking for it. We mask our yearning in a zillion different ways, but it comes down to hunger for the real thing.

But we can help make it appear in our lives. The very thought that we can actively bring love closer -- and put it into our own lives to bring fulfillment -- is a total surprise to many people. And I, for one, find it deliciously intriguing. You, too? Come; dream along with me.

Let's say you're out in the world, coming or going, headed for work or on a personal mission, when out of the blue, life nudges you into a situation -- a chance encounter that brings you face to face with an appealing someone who looks into your baby blues and returns your startled gaze. The person's gender is, of course, of your choosing, as is the age, poundage and height. Numbers at this point -- when souls collide -- don't seem to matter much. So neither of you walks away from feelings that are much too rare and sparkly.

But back to real life. What happens next is (in part) up to you. Do you make the most of what happened right under your nose? You will if you're prepared, if you've been nurturing the tenderness within yourself and using your fine mind to rein in the unruly fears that can block you from any chance of finding partnered joy. Like attracts like; of that I am certain. No, not in the color of a tie or a blouse but in the larger scheme of lovability. Just how to make yourself fertile ground for loving? Making yourself a love magnet begins by sending the world strong signals of self-acceptance, self-confidence and self-awareness. (Gulp.)

Yes. You are the one who furnishes your soul with love and tenderness. When you can give it to yourself, you can give it to your beloved and beyond. Way beyond. Are you a diminisher -- someone who takes people down a peg -- or an augmenter, someone who makes them feel good about being who they are? Do you like the person you've grown into, or are you still restless and dissatisfied? Are you a helper, a giver? Are you a good friend, trustable, dependable, someone who follows through on promises? By now you get the message: Be the person you want in your life.

I find the concept of creating love to be all-encompassing. And thrilling. That you can do something to augment the possibilities of finding love is not only empowering but also, in a way, magical. And it's been proved that certain people create their own form of electricity. Their thoughts, their posture, their very facial expressions can invite or repel life's pulsations.

Enough said?

Have a question for Susan? You can reach her directly at susan@single-file.com. We've uncovered another treasure trove of "Single File" paperbacks - in perfect condition, signed by Susan, ready to enjoy. Send $15 and your address: Susan Deitz, C/O Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.